Ho! ho! ho!

Somewhere, someone in administration has developed a sense of humour.

Each morning, we print out a computer list of our patients that tells us how long they have been in hospital and when we are really lucky, where they are.

This morning, my resident showed me my list. Admitted at midnight to my unit was Santa Claus, with travellers' diarrhoea!

We went to see Santa (who looked amazingly like the resuscitation training manikin with cotton wool taped to his chin). At the bedside, we noted very prominent auditory and visual hallucinations (he sees elves and flying reindeer) and also unshakable delusions of grandeur (he is the only one who can make sure every child has a gift).

With these things in mind we sent off an urgent referral to the psychiatry liaison and consultation service.

Meanwhile, a parking permit application form was sent back to admin for processing.